Enterprise -- PLYMOUTH — Carol Machado tried Saturday to explain to her children the meaning of the lowered flag flying outside Memorial Hall honoring a young Marine killed in the Iraq War on Thursday.

"It frightens them to know it's so close to home," Machado said as she hugged her two children. "It makes me sad."

The photograph of Lance Cpl. Jeffrey C. Burgess, 20, has brought home the reality of war even for those, like Machado, who never knew the Marine whose baby face looks younger than his age.

"He looks just like the Burgesses," said selectmen Chairman Kenneth Tavares as he stood in the shadow of the lowered flag outside Memorial Hall Saturday. "This is one of our boys, one of our kids," he said, offering the town's support to the family as they prepare for a military funeral.

Burgess is the son of Michelle (Ford) Shea, now of Sagamore Beach, and Scott Burgess of Plymouth.

Tavares said he grew up in town with the Burgess family, worked with Shea many years ago and with her mother, retired Plymouth assessor Mary (Delano) Ford, formerly of Rockland.

The sadness being felt throughout the community is shared across the country in California where Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger also ordered the flags lowered to honor Burgess, who was in the lead vehicle of a convoy when it ran over a mine and exploded near Baqubah, Iraq. Burgess, who was assigned to Marine support squadron stationed in Miramar, Calif., died from shrapnel wounds.

He grew up on Briggs Avenue in the Manomet section of Plymouth with his older siblings, Jennifer and Jason. His grandparents, Mary and Charles Ford lived nearby. They have since relocated to Florida.

Saturday, Mary Ford recalled her last message from her grandson.

"I got an email from him this past week to remind me of his birthday," she said, "one of those 'Oh, by the way Gram, I'll be 21 this birthday." His birthday is in April.

"We are going to miss him more than words can say," the grieving grandmother said as she prepared to return to Plymouth for the funeral. The family expects Burgess's body to be returned to Plymouth later this week from Dover Air Force Base in Delaware.

Burgess attended Manomet Elementary School, Plymouth Community Intermediate School and graduated in 2001 from Plymouth South High School where he was a percussionist in the band for four years.

That is where he blended in as a quiet student with leadership qualities, principal Robert O'Shea said. And, that is where he stood out as a comic, always making sure his closeknit group of friends from the percussion line were having a good time and laughing, said Lauren Pullia, a former girlfriend.

They are facing a difficult time, burying one of their peers, said retired Plymouth veterans agent Antonio Gomes.

"When I was in the service three of my (Wareham) high school classmates were casualties," he said. "It did a tremendous jolt to me because most of them were in sports with me, classmates and teammates."

Gomes, who retired last year after 30 years as veterans agent, said this is Plymouth's first war death since Vietnam in the late 1960s. It is the second Iraq casualty in the region in a year. Last April, First Lt. Brian McPhillips, 25, a Pembroke Marine serving with the 2nd Marine Division 2nd Tank Battalion was killed when his unit was ambushed. A former Plymouth man, Sgt. 1st Class Robert F. Rooney, 43, died in a non-combat related accident in Kuwait last year while serving with the 379th Engineering Co. based in Bourne.

Plymouth had five casualties in Vietnam, according to Gomes.

He said the death of a young man in a war that was said to be over is troubling.

"Sometimes I wonder why we're still there," he said. "The war was supposed to be over but it's dragging on. It seems like the casualties are almost duplicating the casualties from the original war."

The question of the war was on the minds of many as they mourned the death of a young man, who family and friends say was proud to be a Marine.

"The war, it should have never happened," said Machado, thankful that her children are too young to realize what is going on, but now must learn because the town is in mourning for a young man who was doing his job, serving his country.

Erich Scharath, commander of the Disabled American Veterans and service officer for the Veterans of Foreign Wars, both of Plymouth, said he just mailed 22 packages to Plymouth men and women serving in Iraq, including Burgess.

Scharath said he knows the anxieties of families who have a loved one in the war area. His son, Plymouth police officer Jonathan Scharath, is on his way home from Iraq after serving 11 months on the front lines.

"Let's hope we get the hell out of there," said Scharath, who stands ready to assist the Burgess family in the coming days, weeks and beyond.

The American Legion, too, has offered its support for the upcoming services.

"It's not easy for anybody," said Sergeant-at-arms Paul Thurston, "especially when its in your hometown."